Talenti Chocolate Fudge Swirl (Crafted with Less Sugar)

Fuck Halo Top. Lol, wut? This isn't even a Halo Top review, but hear me out. There were 'health' ice creams, such as Arctic Zero, before Halo Top, but Halo Top added a high-protein gimmick and cute marketing and has steadily been capturing more of the ice cream market and I hate them. Mainly I hate their branding and message that completely centers around food guilt. Like, can we just not at this point? Eat real ice cream if you want to. Eat Halo Top if you want to. But let's all just respect and not police each other's food choices. Also, they have a shit product. I think I described their Birthday Cake flavor as like eating paper sprayed with birthday cake-scented perfume. Finally, I hate them because brands like Talenti and Ben and Jerry's now feel the need to step into the 'healthy' ice cream market. Urgh.

In an ideal world, I would stay away from these new 'healthy' options, but I'm an ice cream blogger, so I'm taking one from the team and sampling a few. I decided to try Talenti's Chocolate Fudge Swirl, because it seemed like the most decadent and most likely to be decent out of the three lower sugar options.

First of all, Talenti claims this is flavored with monk fruit juice, which is the latest hip, non-sugar sweetener. While monk fruit juice does appear on the ingredient list, it's waaaaaay at the end, and erythritol is listed only after milk and soluble corn fiber. So, really, this is sweetened with erythritol.


You probably won't be able to eat this straight out of the freezer since it's initially too hard to scoop, but if you do, you will have a bad time. It tastes like shaved ice mixed with sawdust and has about the same texture. The chocolate is really just an undertone to the texture.


If you let this sit for a bit before scooping, it gets a little better. The texture gets better, but it's still nowhere near the creaminess of normal Talenti gelato. The chocolate flavor also gets better, but it stills feels like it doesn't really permeate the pint. Unlike 'real' ice cream or gelato where the richness and natural sweetness of the dairy provide a base for the flavor, the chocolate flavor seems to just sit on top of the base.

I rate this šŸ¦.5/4. The extra .5 is basically because it's not Halo Top and at least this pint of ice cream isn't trying to make me feel guilty when I go back to full-sugar Talenti.

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